Your beauty takes my breath away…
But not just your outside beauty, that is inevitable to notice, but you also have a big heart, it makes me so happy to see
Your hair is so long, like you say “my princess hair” and its about to be very short soon. Since we watched a youtube movie about kids with cancer you are letting it grow to donate it and make a child with cancer happy. You make me measure your ponytail almost every week to see if it has reached 10 inches yet, and it did, barely, but your hair would be so short and I keep telling you to wait a couple more months but you could care less. You just want to do it. I know this day will be so important for you. I can’t wait!
A little over a month ago, we lost our kitty Lola, your first pet. You found her dead with me and I will never, ever forget your reaction. Honey, you didn’t know what to do. You were jumping around, screaming her name and I never saw your face so puffy and red from crying before. You understood what death was right there, sigh. When we were at the vet, we put Lola on the table and we were all talking to her, saying our goodbyes. You came to her and whispered in her ear, “Lola, don’t be scared. Someone in Heaven will take care of you and one day we are all going to die and we will be together again” Just writing this, once again, made me cry.
You are so independent, you have always been. You can play in your room for hours, all by yourself with all your Pet Shop toys, you love your bedroom and you are so organized, you like everything in its place. I don’t remember you breaking any of your toys, you take great care of everything you have.
This year, you asked me for a surprise birthday party. You don’t want to know where is going to be, the theme, if it is going to be cake or cupcakes. I thought this was pretty cute and it matches your personality. You are creative and you enjoy things like that. So, unlike last year, at a gym with lots of friends, I am planning a tea party for you, with your close friends. I just ordered the invites and I am asking them to dress fancy, like your best friend Zaleeya likes to say, and you will have a storyteller to enjoy. Oh, and it will be pink, your favorite color. It will be a simple get together, cozy and yummy food will be served. I hope you feel special. I hope I see your smile.
I love your smile. Your little tiny teeth that I help to brush everyday and I know they will only be around for one more year or two and then they will be replaced with big girl teeth. You are growing up baby girl. Like a lot of people say, you are a big girl now but I don’t see it yet. For me, you are still very little. You have so much to learn in this life and I want you to take your time and enjoy these amazing years ahead of you. Your job now is to play and that is how you will learn things.
Follow your dreams! But I want you to know that following your dream can be the hardest and scariest thing in this world. You also need to know that nobody was born in this world knowing the right way, mistakes have to be made and you will learn from them, I promise that to you.
Although, I sometimes am not a big fan of your strong will; boy, you drive me crazy and make me mad… I also know that you are just like me. We have the same personality, we want everything our way and right away, like your father says, “It’s fire against fire” and can sound funny but he needs to separate us sometimes. I love that. Poor daddy though, he has to deal with both of us but honestly, I think he loves it too!
I know for sure that I am far from being a perfect mother but I want you to know, you are perfect to me. I love you the way you are and whatever you will be I will always love you.
I am proud to be your mother. I am proud of you. Five years honey, five years.
I love you so much.